32 Box Office Blockbusters That Actually Suck
Does tremendous success at the box office always mean a movie is actually good? No, not necessarily. Over the years, there have been countless releases that brought in a ton of cash but were nothing more than big stinkers in terms of cinematic quality. Below is just 32 box office blockbusters that actually suck. And while a lot of these duds are from the past decade or so (which is probably more of an indication of modern Hollywood), there are a few nostalgic ‘90s movies that aren’t that good looking back.
Robin Hood: Prince Of Thieves (1991)
Robin Hood: Prince of Thieves features one of Alan Rickman’s best performances, but that’s about the only thing this 1991 historical drama has going for it. Robin Hood’s English accent is nowhere to be found, Morgan Freeman’s Azeem Edi Bashir Al Bakir is a poorly aged stereotype, and the pacing is all over the place. Yet, somehow, it made $390 million worldwide, per Box Office Mojo.
The Hangover Part III (2013)
The Hangover was a massive hit with audiences and critics alike, featured some iconic cinematic moments, and was all-around a good time. However, The Hangover III, the third and final entry in the franchise released in 2013, was a different story. It still made a ton of cash – $362 million per Box Office Mojo – but the movie straight-up stunk. Despite having a premise very similar to what came before, it lacked the charm, heart, and joy of the original movie.
Pearl Harbor (2001)
Michael Bay’s Pearl Harbor was supposed to be the big summer blockbuster of 2001 (it was released on Memorial Day weekend), but this overstuffed, overlong, and outright boring romantic drama masquerading as a World War II epic was just not good. Sure, the actual Pearl Harbor sequence is cool, but the rest of the movie, not so much. However, it did bring in $449 million worldwide according to Box Office Mojo, so what do I know?
Jurassic World: Dominion (2022)
Jurassic World: Dominion made a cool $1 billion during its theatrical release, per Box Office Mojo, but let’s be real for a second… this movie sucks. Yeah, it was cool seeing OG cast team up with the Jurassic World characters, but everything else about the movie, especially the dinosaurs, felt like an afterthought. There’s talk of a new Jurassic World movie, but we should just let these dinos stay dead at this point.
Fifty Shades Of Grey (2015)
Okay, no one was walking into Fifty Shades of Grey expecting to see cinema at its finest back on Valentine’s Day weekend 2015, but let’s not act like this clumsy and awkward erotic thriller was great by any means. $569 million worldwide (per Box Office Mojo) is nothing to scoff at, but the best parts of this movie can be watched in a YouTube clip compilation.
The Last Airbender (2010)
Could The Last Airbender be the worst movie from 2010? Quite possibly despite some stiff competition. This live-action adaptation of the beloved Avatar: The Last Airbender animated series made $319 million worldwide, per Box Office Mojo, but the massive drop in receipts following opening weekend should be more than enough to tell you about the quality of this film.
The Matrix Reloaded (2003)
Okay, The Matrix Reloaded does have a few cool scenes (the highway sequence is still great 20-plus years later), but this 2003 sequel was straight-up wack. All the promise of The Matrix was thrown out the window with this movie that seemed to only be around to set up the third entry in the franchise. But there was a lot of hype for it, which explains its absurd $741 million returns, per Box Office Mojo.
Star Wars: Episode I – The Phantom Menace (1999)
Take off those rose-tinted glasses because Star Wars: Episode 1 – The Phantom Menace is not a good movie, even if it gave us one of the best John Williams compositions (“Duel of the Fates”). Box Office Mojo has the first entry in the “Prequel Trilogy” bringing in a whopping $1 billion, but I wonder if those people knew they were about to learn more about trade alliances and blockades than Darth Vader.
X-Men: The Last Stand (2006)
X-Men was great. X2: X-Men United is one of the best superhero movies of all time. But X-Men: The Last Stand, which made the most money out of the original trilogy – $460 million, per Box Office Mojo, was a maddening, confusing, and hard-to-watch mess that ruined all the goodwill of the franchise until it was rebooted a half-decade later.
Pirates Of The Caribbean: On Stranger Tides (2011)
The worst movie in the franchise, Pirates of the Caribbean: On Stranger Tides is a movie that should be walked off the plank and sent to the bottom of the ocean. Despite lacking in all the qualities that made the first film such a delight, this 2011 sequel wasn’t impacted by franchise fatigue (at least with audiences), as Box Office Mojo has its total gross at over $1 billion worldwide.
Ghost Rider (2007)
Though not as successful as other superhero blockbusters, Ghost Rider did make an impressive $228 million worldwide back in 2007, per Box Office Mojo. But don’t let that success fool you, because this Nicolas Cage Marvel movie is bad. Sure, it’s not as bad as its sequel, but it’s not good. Not at all.
Wild Wild West (1999)
Wild Wild West was a movie that should have worked, should have been a major blockbuster, and should have spawned a franchise. But this movie starring Will Smith and Kevin Kline as special agents trying to prevent a tyrannical madman from taking over the world was so bad that not even its target audience (young boys between the ages of 10 and 13) didn’t care for it. Yet, it still made $222 million worldwide, per Box Office Mojo.
Batman V Superman: Dawn Of Justice (2016)
Despite the best efforts of director Zack Snyder, the cast, and pretty much everyone involved with the now-defunct DCEU, Batman v Superman: Dawn of Justice didn’t work and is now considered one of the worst superhero movies in recent memory. It was too long, too dark, and lacking much of the fun and joy that makes comic book movies fun to watch. Despite all of that, it made $874 million worldwide, per Box Office Mojo.
Godzilla (1998)
The 1998 Godzilla, despite being a steaming pile of trash, made a decent chunk of change during its theatrical run, with a total of $379 million in receipts, per Box Office Mojo. This movie, which is in the lower tier of Zilla films, was way too long, way too dark, and felt more like Jurassic Park in NYC than a proper kaiju epic.
Divergent (2014)
The Divergent movies, while not the worst YA film adaptations that came out in the wake of The Hunger Games, but this doesn’t mean it’s a crowning cinematic achievement or anything like that. In fact, this movie is boring, trite, and overall just kind of blah. But hey, people must have liked it because it brought in $288 million worldwide per Box Office Mojo.
2 Fast 2 Furious (2003)
This could apply to most of the movies in the Fast & Furious franchise (I’m a massive fan, by the way), but 2 Fast 2 Furious sucks. The second entry (the only one not to feature Vin Diesel) series is fun to watch all these years later, but boy, it’s not good. Taking what kind of worked with The Fast and the Furious and not adding anything new in terms of the plot or stunts, this movie is best remembered for introducing franchise mainstays Roman Pearce (Tyrese Gibson) and Tej Park (Chris “Ludacris” Bridges). It did make $236 million, per Box Office Mojo, which wasn’t too terrible, unlike the movie itself.
The Da Vinci Code (2006)
Wait, The Da Vinci Code made $760 million during its theatrical run back in 2006? Box Office Mojo doesn’t lie, so I’ll have to try and accept that reality. What I won’t accept are the lies people spew when they say this Tom Hanks murder mystery is a good movie. The hair, the lack of chemistry between the actors, and a story with way too many twists and turns make this a maddening odyssey of suck.
G.I. Joe: Retaliation (2013)
Despite having Dwayne Johnson, Channing Tatum, and Bruce Willis on screen, G.I. Joe: Retaliation is not a great movie. It’s not even a good movie. But don’t tell that to the folks who collectively forked out $375 million, per Box Office Mojo, to watch this overstuffed blockbuster.
Fantastic Four (2005)
The first Fantastic Four movie, though not as awful as the attempted reboot that followed a decade later, is corny beyond belief and is not necessarily a good movie. The cast seemed to get along well enough, but the story, action, and dated special effects are enough to make you turn off FX’s DVD on TV whenever it comes on. Despite those shortcomings, however, it did make $333 million worldwide, according to Box Office Mojo.
Planet Of The Apes (2001)
There were a lot of bad movies in 2001, and one of the biggest offenders was Tim Burton’s Planet of the Apes remake. Released a decade before Rupert Wyatt retooled the franchise with Rise of the Planet of the Apes, this movie managed to bring in $362 million, according to Box Office Mojo. But don’t let those figures fool you, this dated, campy, and boring summer blockbuster will put you to sleep.
Transformers: Revenge Of The Fallen (2009)
There are a few good Transformers movies, but Revenge of the Fallen is not one of them. This 2009 sequel to Transformers brought in $836 million, according to Box Office Mojo, but that something isn’t good just because it makes a lot of money. There are plenty of reasons it’s considered one of the worst entries in the franchise.
Clash Of The Titans (2010)
Despite bringing in $439 million, per Box Office Mojo, the 2010 remake of Clash of the Titans is not good, not in the slightest. Unlike the 1981 fantasy film of the same name which featured some nifty, albeit aged, special effects and human performances, this monstrosity is a CGI-filled mess that sees the cast act in front of one blue screen after another without a lot of tension or enjoyment.
Grown Ups (2010)
Though I’m sure Adam Sandler and the rest of the Grown Ups cast had fun working on this 2010 comedy, few who watched the movie shared in the joy experienced by these Saturday Night Live alums and Kevin James. But I could be wrong (not really), as the movie made $271 million, according to Box Office Mojo.
Alice In Wonderland (2010)
As hard as it is to believe, Alice in Wonderland, the 2010 Tim Burton fever dream, made an incomprehensible amount of money during its run. According to Box Office Mojo, this movie, which is a drag despite looking pretty cool, brought in $1 billion worldwide.
Indiana Jones And The Kingdom Of The Crystal Skull (2008)
The worst Indiana Jones movie by far, 2008’s Kingdom of the Crystal Skull is not a good time and should have been left in the warehouse under the supervision of “top men.” But people will try anything, even out of morbid curiosity, and that was the case here, as the lifeless and mind-boggling blockbuster made $790 million, according to Box Office Mojo.
Patch Adams (1998)
Patch Adams, or “Oscar Bait: The Movie” is a movie that tries to teach the audience (which gave the 1998 biopic $202 million per Box Office Mojo) that you don’t need a medical license or proper procedures to treat patients. Instead, kindness and laughter and clown noses do the trick, or so they say.
2012 (2009)
Though it’s a fun disaster film, 2012 is not something you’d necessarily consider “good.” Though long, predictable, and a bore outside of the destruction scenes, this Roland Emmerich flick made $791 million, per Box Office Mojo.
Little Fockers (2010)
How Little Fockers made $310 million (per Box Office Mojo) upon its release in 2010 is beyond me because this movie, unlike Meet the Parents, is an absolute disaster. The jokes that hit were just retreads of what worked in the past and the new material was just downright awful.
Crocodile Dundee II (1988)
Though nowhere as bad as its successor, Crocodile Dundee II is a sequel that you’re better off skipping. Released just two years after the overnight sensation that was Crocodile Dundee, this safe and by-the-numbers sequel rehashes the same jokes and same situations but with diminishing returns. But it did make $239 million worldwide, per Box Office Mojo.
The Mummy: Tomb Of The Dragon Emperor (2008)
The Mummy: Tomb of the Dragon Emperor somehow made $403 million back in 2008, according to Box Office Mojo. I’m not really sure how, because this movie lacked all the fun, heart, and soul of the first Mummy movie and is largely forgotten these days.
Independence Day: Resurgence (2016)
A movie so bad Will Smith wanted nothing to do with it, Independence Day: Resurgence is something that should be avoided at all costs. Despite bringing in $389 million, per Box Office Mojo, lacks everything that made the 1996 summer blockbuster so much fun in the first place, especially Randy Quaid.
Van Helsing (2004)
It’s dark, it’s drab, it’s boring, it’s Van Helsing. Even if you disregard the poorly-aged CGI, terrible dialogue, and the rest of the film’s shortcomings, it’s hard to figure out how the Hugh Jackman-led monster flick made $300 million back in 2004, per Box Office Mojo. But it’s best to just let sleeping dogs, err, werewolves, lie.
Are these movies the worst of all time? No, not really. But they are very much in the “suck” range on the movie quality spectrum. Now I just need to figure out how they made so much money and try to replicate it.
